Dragging heels. Submersion for hour long bathing periods. Clinging to the cold side of the tub, a bare back/a hair stroke/a hand squeeze to alleviate head long confusion and aches. A long way from departure yet a close encounter with suffering. Everyone struggles in the January bleak. Memories wreak havoc on the frequency bar and need not become habitual comforts. Meditating through the trapeze act with only a few more catches to make.